I have been a bad blogger! Sorry for the delays, what can I say life sometimes gets in the way! I guess I should say hobbies have been getting in my way. I have started making hair bows. I just saw them one day and decided I could do that, so I did! I have made several different styles and I have even branched out into making bow holders to hang on the walls. Here are some pictures so you can see!
Onto baby stuff. Nothing is happening. Nothing.at.all. I am wondering how long to keep trying. I know we have not even done all the testing we can do, but I think I am torn on what I want to do. Maybe we are just destined to be childless people. I don't know. I have thought about fostering but then I think it would be terrible to love a child and have it taken away, I don't know if my heart could handle that. Adoption is so terribly expensive and we seem to be the type of folks that can't catch a break financially so we probably wouldn't get any type of assistance. So here we are. No further than we were almost 2 years ago. The only difference now is that it doesn't feel so life or death. I think I might just be reaching the point of: ok, so we are childless, let's make the most of it. Or at least I am there today. Tomorrow, I might be OHMYGOSH, I can't live without a baby! That's the joy of trying to get pregnant...the ups and the downs (sarcasm is my second language).
I am getting ready to do our taxes at some point soon. I know it sounds fun and you really want to be me, but I am destined to have ALL the fun! Don't be jealous! I kid, I kid! I really don't mind doing our taxes. They are not terribly complicated, but sometimes frustration gets the better of me. It is just so time consuming. I paid to have them done one year. When it costs you more to have them done than you get back...so not worth it!
Here is my parting thought:
Faith, it does not make things easy, it makes them possible. Luke 1:37
I feel like I could have written what you wrote about baby stuff. I am on the exact same wavelength as you right now....wavering between thinking about living childless, fostering, adoption, our lack of funding for adoption, trying to get pregnant. It's like a never ending cycle of thoughts!
ReplyDeleteYou are so right about the never ending cycle of thoughts. I know that I have not gone through nearly the extent of so many and then I feel guilty about thinking of giving up. It's like if I haven't tried everything there is to try that I haven't tried hard enough, if that makes any sense at all! I hope that we both find some peace in whatever decision we make.
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