Where to start

It truly has been a craptastic week.  D finished his last SA on Monday and we went for the results on Wednesday.  My gynecologist called with the results and told us D was fine.  After I told him the results, he said, "I knew it wasn't me"...umm, excuse me?!  I let it go, until Tuesday.  I asked him to fill out the paper work for the Urologist appointment.  He was not having fun with that btw.  He was very agitated about it.  So, I went to exercise and when I got back, he was even more pissed off than when I left which led to a tremendous fight which didn't really end until today.  I am not going to go into all the details but let's just say it was bad.  What makes it worse is that we hardly ever fight so we don't really know what to do.  I am going to go to a counselor to help with my feelings over our IF.  I am hoping D goes with me at some point.  I think with all the stuff he as going on with his family, he could really use some counseling too.  He told me that he didn't know if he would ever be happy.  Wow, really?!  He went on to say, he doesn't think he will be happy in his job, that he is happy with me and our relationship.  Whew!  SOOOO, anyway, that's enough for tonight dear readers.  I will keep you updated on the issues at hand.  Just not sure when there will be an update.
 
**side note: When we went to the Uro, he said with numbers like D's, he was not the issue, so it must be me.  He went on to say either my tubes are blocked or my eggs are bad.  Ok, so let's jump to the worst possible conclusion.  The doctor is not an reproductive specialist so I take what he says with a grain of salt, but still it kind of gave me a kick in the gut. 

Weight Loss

Ok, I have been lazy!  I know it.  I am only exercising one day a week and haven't even been following my South Beach for the past two weeks!  So tomorrow is the day, I am back on the wagon...no more bread and potatoes for me.  I know this weight loss has been beneficial for me, I had a 27/28 day cycle this time!  Who knew weight loss, exercise and cutting out carbs would be so helpful, ummm, yeah, my doctors that's who!  My endo and gyno have both been telling me for  a year to lose weight and exercise that I would be surprised at how much it would help.  I am kind of ticked off that they were right!  hahahaha!  So here I go, back on the diet!

On the baby making front, I am DYING to know the results of D's SA.  It is taking every ounce of self-control I have not to call the office to get the numbers.  I don't know what exactly I would do with the numbers when I got them, but I just know I would feel better if I had them.  He goes for the next SA on the 23rd and we go to the Urologist on the 25th, so I am going to wait and not be ONE OF THOSE patients.  I have my fingers crossed for good news though.  If D's SAs come back fine then it is my turn to go and have some testing.  I will have the HSG done to make sure my tubes are clear.  I have had the routine blood work done with my Endocrinologist which led to my PCOS diagnosis.  I need to get put on D's insurance so I can have some IF coverage before I start anything else.  So that's where we are.  Not really any further along, but so much further along!  I will update as soon as I get the results!

D's SA...

D went for his test today.  He was such a trooper about it.  I know it was tough for him to go and do this, but I am so proud of him for following through.  He did tell me that he was only in there for about 2 minutes before the nurses started knocking!  I hope he didn't have stage fright...I didn't ask!  He asked me what would happen if it was him.  I told him that it didn't matter who it was, we would work through it.  I really hope it is not him, I really hope it's not me. I don't want to be unexplained either.  I am the kind of person if I have an answer, I can live with it.  But if it is just "unexplained" then that leaves you with nothing to hold on to.