Tuesday, August 23, 2011

This and that

Anyone who has known me for any length of time, knows I am a worrier.  I try very hard not to be, but I just can't stop, it is my nature.  I think I have worried since the day I was born!  One day old me: "I hope that thing on my belly button is going to be ok.  Do you think it looks inflamed?  Somebody, anyone?!"  I can seriously remember being worried that my mom, who is quite competent and intelligent, would not remember how to get back to our house or that we would not be home in time for my older brothers to get off the bus.  See what I mean, I am a worrier.

The biggest worry for me right now obviously is having a baby.  I did not feel this worry until the last few months.  I am thinking it has to do with the fact that we are now in cycle 14 and D is out of town during my fertile time.  I feel like we are wasting this cycle and WHAT IF this was supposed to be it?!  I am beginning to think I need some therapy and I am only 1/2 kidding!  I can tell that I have not been praying enough.  I need to work on this.  I keep giving my troubles to God because I know He can handle them, but then I take them back so I can worry about them some more.  What is wrong with me!?  I am going to work on this as my personal goal this week.  Pray more, worry less!

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